Women, women, women...
What is it about women that make them unable to hear and comprehend the simplest of concepts? Like "No, I don't want to be in a relationship with you."
I have a friend, Jodie-the girl-who-won't-date-me. She's an adorable woman, smart, funny, cute as anything with a warm, caring, fun personality. I've known 6 or 7 women who'd love to take her out. But there's one woman in particular who has been unable or unwilling to hear what Jodie has been telling her for months.
Literally months. Jodie has been telling her "I think you're great. I'm not ready for a relationship. Thanks for asking." Everybody in the known world *knows* that this is "polite-speak" for "I don't want to go out with you."
Evidently it's "everyone in the known world minus one" cause this chick just ain't gettin' it! Out of one side of her mouth she's saying "Oh, I'd love to just be friends" and out of the other side she's saying "I can't get you out of my head." Jodie has tried to be as polite as she can possibly be - she's one of those women who doesn't want to hurt anyone's feelings... but I think it's coming to a head. I told her "You can't say 'I don't want to be in a relationship', you have to say 'I don't want to be in a relationship *with you*'" Don't leave wiggle room for ambiguous readings like "I don't want to be in a relationship right now" means "I'm not ready at the moment but if you hang around for a couple of months I might change my mind." Cause that's what this woman thinks.
So poor Jodie is being put in the position of doing exactly what it is that she's been trying to avoid: she's going to have to be blunt to the point of hurting this chick's feelings. And I tell her "That's not your problem. If her feelings get hurt it's her own fault for not listening to what you've been saying for 6 months."
Perhaps it's just me, but if someone says to you "I don't want to be in a relationship right now" - give it up!! Put a period on it. Move on.
Of course, this would have more impact if I followed my own "Move on." advice...
*grin*
I have a friend, Jodie-the girl-who-won't-date-me. She's an adorable woman, smart, funny, cute as anything with a warm, caring, fun personality. I've known 6 or 7 women who'd love to take her out. But there's one woman in particular who has been unable or unwilling to hear what Jodie has been telling her for months.
Literally months. Jodie has been telling her "I think you're great. I'm not ready for a relationship. Thanks for asking." Everybody in the known world *knows* that this is "polite-speak" for "I don't want to go out with you."
Evidently it's "everyone in the known world minus one" cause this chick just ain't gettin' it! Out of one side of her mouth she's saying "Oh, I'd love to just be friends" and out of the other side she's saying "I can't get you out of my head." Jodie has tried to be as polite as she can possibly be - she's one of those women who doesn't want to hurt anyone's feelings... but I think it's coming to a head. I told her "You can't say 'I don't want to be in a relationship', you have to say 'I don't want to be in a relationship *with you*'" Don't leave wiggle room for ambiguous readings like "I don't want to be in a relationship right now" means "I'm not ready at the moment but if you hang around for a couple of months I might change my mind." Cause that's what this woman thinks.
So poor Jodie is being put in the position of doing exactly what it is that she's been trying to avoid: she's going to have to be blunt to the point of hurting this chick's feelings. And I tell her "That's not your problem. If her feelings get hurt it's her own fault for not listening to what you've been saying for 6 months."
Perhaps it's just me, but if someone says to you "I don't want to be in a relationship right now" - give it up!! Put a period on it. Move on.
Of course, this would have more impact if I followed my own "Move on." advice...
*grin*
posted by Blue Blankie at 8:09:00 PM
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