This made me laugh out loud

(From another list)

I had a dream that Princess Diana came back to Earth to lead the rapture!

This is the last time I read Vanity Fair before bed!

My boy and his girl

I love my boy - you know I love my boy! I've raised him his whole life (mostly). I've disciplined him, laughed with him, cuddled him, tickled him, yelled at him, advised him, listened to him.

He moved out in the summer. His mother was devastated for a while, but got used to it. The Boy did very well on his own - paid all his bills on time, ate well, got himself to work on time, got into a nice routine...

However, thing with the roommate have gone from good to civil to "I can't stand the sight of you, leave my shit alone, I'm not sharing my cereal with you."

The boy has decided that he's going to move out - find the roommate a different roommate, get off the lease.... and come home. For a few months. And the girlfriend is coming with him. Because her parents are bizarre, didn't like how much time she was spending with the Boy and kicked her out of the house. So she's living with the Boy.



I love him, I seriously do... I'm just not sure I want him home. It's taken some time to get used to him not being here, but now that I am... it's nice *smile*.

Ah well, I'm sure that I'll deal... she's a very nice girl, sweet and inoffensive... and he knows damn well that I'm not supporting them. He's getting a job and giving me rent and grocery money.

Slot Machines

'Tis a good thing when you take your $40 to the slot machines and come out ahead $100.

I like that a lot.

Not that I do it often, cause, well, I just can't afford to be pissing money away like that. But about once a month, I'll take my $20, go to the casino and play the nickle slots.

I know! I know! Last of the big time gamblers, me. A whole nickle a spin! But the machine I play (and yes, I have MY machine. I stand there and pout if someone else is playing it until they get up and go away.), the machine I play you can play nine lines at a time and bet anywhere from 1 to 5 nickles a line. I usually go with 9 lines and 1 nickle per line. You can play on nickle slots forever with $20 *grin*.

So, I threw in my $20...got up over 2200 credits and decided to cash it out *grin*.

I can't wait to go again.

We decided that we were going to have the boy over for dinner. As his friend was sitting here at the time, we said that the boy's friend (Son #2) could come for dinner, too. I invited Jodie-the-girl-who-won't-date-me to come because we had some work to do over the weekend anyway.

So, Saturday rolls around, and I wake up with the WORST chest infection! I mean, I couldn't catch my breath for nothing! Walking up the stairs made me have to sit and breath for 5 minutes before I could function again. I'm feeling like absolute crap! Fortunately, I had some antibiotics lying around so I took those.

Then the boy calls... would it be ok if he brought his girlfriend over for dinner, too? Uh, sure honey, no problem. Bring her along! (Keep in mind that we have not yet MET this girl).

Jodie calls and says "Are we still on for tonight?" I say we sure are, and would you mind running me to the grocery store? Not a problem says she.

We go to the grocery store, which is an exercise in concentration for me since I can't walk and talk at the same time. I have enough breath for one or the other and I end up apologizing to Jodie time and time again for my seeming silence *grin*.

We get our groceries and go home, whereupon I have to go take a shower, mostly to see if I can break up some of the gunk in my lungs. While I'm in the shower, Jodie puts away all the groceries, washes up what's in the sink and starts peeling potatoes. I come down all brand new clean and start cutting potatoes, only to have to quit with about 5 left cause I had to go sit down.

I have to tell you folks, if I wasn't in love with the girl before now, I would have been on Saturday. She took over the kitchen, got things cooked, got dishes out, mashed potatoes, cut ham, cooked vegetables, poured drinks, and she wouldn't let me do anything. Every time I poked my nose into the kitchen, it was to have her tell me to go sit down. I did manage to get in there to get the food out to the table. *grin*. She was so sweet and so supportive and just so darling with everything... . I think I'm in love.

The boy's girlfriend is nice, very shy, very quiet but polite. Although I'm sure that she's anorexic. Waaaaaaay too thin for her height. Unhealthily thin.

All in all, though, it was a good little dinner party *grin*

Top 10 Reasons Gay Marriage Should Be Illegal

10 Reasons Why Gay Marriage is Wrong


01) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.

02) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

03) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

04) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

05) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

06) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.

07) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

08) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.

09) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.